kryptonite.

when you say kryptonite first thing that hits your brain is the one that you encounter reading on a comic books. superhero character comes into the picture and since wiki is my bestfriend nowadays, i searched for it and uncover these superman terms yada yada. why am i writing something about kryptonite? well first, this would be total nonsense if it hasn't something to do with me. i was watching some reruns of Zooey's New Girl  and there was this one episode that sorta nailed my senses. she was kinda having hard time making a big step forward after that break up with pseudo ex-boyfriend, struggling in moving on because her character here is someone who is too nice, too good to be true, the usual happy go lucky type that always makes her feel good on simple things around her. she loves to mimic, making funny faces, and when she thinks all is fcuked up she mends in a weird way. she sings, she thinks of theme song of her emotional state, she even watch the famous flick "Dirty Dancing" all over again just because she gets the kind of gratification in mending the pain. ok going back, why really kryptonite??! well on that episode alone, i see myself on Zooey's character. it was only when Jake Johnson  (Nick) utter these lines that it finally dawned on me.


he refers 'kryptonite' as someone's weakness, depriving her to make the biggest step of all, THAT is getting M-A-D, letting it all out, fighting back. and that's all ME. back in my younger days, i was this short fused person who jumps over the fence when im provoked. i am like that. but as i grew older i've started to make sense on my initial reactions, say bye bye with flight and fight kind of response. i made my own anger management. i had maintained that kind of patience and sense of control. but with all of these, there's a big downside. since i tend to overcome the anger and keep it all to myself, there's a feeling of numbness in me. and that was bad. i tend to skip the emotional thing part and let it pass. i dont normally get mad in a snap. not me knowing it was all piling up. i was like a big pail of water waiting to be filled up and water will start to spill. water was my emotions. faucet was my source of all kinds of emotions.


i was like this in everyone. that's why every time my weakness is being hit, i get to vulnerable with it, i use weakness to cover up my emotions instead of dealing with them, and what do they do? some takes advantage of it, and some are scared. little did i know i need to fight back but it was too late. for last few weeks i had some cases of flaring up and outburst. i was like a spark plug, i got mad and i finally blew up! even i got scared of myself because it took years before i could actually express it. got provoked this time. got to the point wherein i have to say, enough is enough. and sadly, it happened to least of the people i expected to. but now that i have learned the difference of these flaws. dont give in too much and dont give less. its always good to stay in between because thats when you will see the different perspectives of being neutral. i am now starting to take control of the situation. its not bad to react sometimes. if you feel bad about something, express it. don't let it pass without venting it out because the more you do that, the more it get worse. in dealing with people, don't always expect that they will be there always as you what you have stand to do. sometimes expecting the same drill will make you fall real hard. end of the day, you will realize who are these people that is worth sticking by and we don't need kryptonites.

LIN-sanity.

Its really seldom for me to root for an NBA player which I will be fixated on throughout ones career. To name a few I have my first NBA player I really idolizes, Grant Hill and LeBron James, that's it. Hill not just because he's known for a triple double killer but being a family man is what makes me like him as a player. While the latter, LBJ, is a no brainer, being a monster on the court. But right now, we have the soft spoken Jeremy aka LIN-sanity Lin making big waves on the NBA screen. He aint black and not AM-white but he is an Asian! *fistbump* Yes! Iam proud, I am after all an Asian. (masabi lang hehehe) Lin made some explosives, literally bring the house down at NBA. Even the other teams make some good, decent, fair tweets about him. One is Metta World Peace formerly known as Ron Artest, forward of LA Lakers made this tweet @MettaWolrdPeace "God created earth in 7 days, Jeremy Lin created energy in New York city in 6 games" That's right after Lin made his buzzer beater shot against the Raptors, made the shot sooo swiftly. boom! 6th game winning streak for the Knicks! I wont be discussing much of his games stats and all because that would be too much plagiarism. haha! As if! Kidding aside, games he played since he comes of the bench and made a thrilling and commanding performance last February 4, 2012  against the NJ Nets. That was the start and the rest is one big history for this exceptional player. 

Before that game that surprise the whole world, Lin was a soft spoken guy clad with his #17 NY Knicks jersey. Not too many knew he was undrafted during his attempt on an entry the biggest basketball league. But his name is already big during his high school years back in Palo Alto High School in Cali. What makes him more different from the others is that despite the stature he is currently in, he'd maintained his strong faith with God. Yes, he always mentions the guy up there on his interviews and tweets. His involvement with HRAACF  Harvard-Radcliffe Asian American Christian Fellowship is one proof how he managed to stay within the faith he has. He only dreams two things, not only to be the best basketball player but also to be the best Christian follower, quoted from Tam his spiritual adviser. 

On his freshmen year back in Harvard, he was considered as the weakest guy on the floor. But during his sophomore until his Senior year, he was praised by his schoolmates. And the following year after he graduated, he was undrafted. Going amongst the bandwagon of other NBA aspirants. But he got signed up for Golden State Warriors, got some counteroffers from other teams but this was his hometown so he chose that. He didn't shine because of the pressure he got from the fans until such time that he go knee injury then the lockout and all. But one fateful day of December 27 2011, he got waivered from New York Knicks but almost dropped off again from the final list and close on deciding to play on European basketball instead. And as fate meets him, Coach D'Antoni was forced to let him play out of desperation after team has lost their 11 of the last 13games. Its like now or never for the LIN-sanity sparkplug. February 4, he started for the team and make shots everywhere. Suddenly the New York were in jubilation. They were like sleeping giant that makes an uproar at the Madison Sqaure Garden. After that day, Jeremy Lin was famous all over the world. Total madness and everyone going media frenzy with Lin. Despite the stardom, he kept grounded. Lin's admonition of humility only showcase the kind of person he is. 

Majority of the fans not only loved him because of his sterling experience and skills but more importantly the strong faith he maintained from the time he was starting until now that he is reaping the fruits he earned. True servant of our God. 

chris b.

Chris Brown is definitely back. After his much talked about felony assault with his former girlfriend, Rihanna. The 'pretty boy' of the dance floor is now taking the driver seat once again. Amidst of the controversies and not to mention the millions criticisms he got along the way, but hey! the guy can dance, the guy can sing so crap! lets give him a chance. My ultimate favorite is ' Forever ' and i think this video one 'er has a good chance of making it to the charts. And not only that, this is the first track that he collaborated with Rihanna so this one has the edge already of getting all the attention that this couple has. So Team Breezy let's give it up for Chris Brown! Hit the floor! 


Turn Up The Music - Chris Brown

soul surfer.

i have few movies in mind that really takes an impact on me. whether it relates to family, friends and most especially when it relates on how to view life. and this one right here tops of my list, next is The Blind Side what makes it more special is its a true to life story. behind the lights and scripts there's a real person who is being portrayed in here. she is Bethany Hamilton. she's now one those people I looked up to.she's not from any kind of cult, not some kind of a faith healer, she aint rich.. just an average girl who wants nothing but to pursue her passion... surfing. 

i like how the movie started. it displayed the kind of childhood Bethany has. how loving, supportive and close knit the family she has. how surfing became a passion and how she greatly loved the sport. the family she got,  from the parents to her two brothers, really made the movie more touching. as she grew older and started to compete, win, and get recognized, she is starting to enjoy the peak she is slowly climbing. one fine day as she went to the famous Tunnels Beach in Kauai because of its great waves to get in some practice for the upcoming big competition, she went with her coach and his 2 kids which happened to be also her best friend. as she and her friend lies on the board while her hand dangling under the water, she was attack by a shark that cost her to lose her left arm. panic, struggle and even blood streaming that almost ends her life was one of the vital parts of this film. from scene every scene after the shark attack, never I've seen her cry. while she was battling and people around her were crying, she was in pain but she wasn't crying. as if she was all wounded but still fighting with so much toughness on her heart. 

days after the attack , she came back on her home and now getting more attention and being mobbed by the press because they call her survival as a miracle. she went home, try to do things and act normal as she used to. but still she was on a stage adjusting that it wont be the same anymore. she finally breaks down when she got to talk with her youth counselor, Sarah Hill, which by the way being portrayed by Carrie Underwood. she began to question God. her faith was shaken. but Sarah says this, 'Its hard to look at things that are too close' and Bethany was realizing that she need to prove something that life doesn't ends there. she took it as her challenge to face the odds. her disability didn't stop her from conquering the heights of her passion in surfing and continues to her volunteering work on World Vision.  

the movie from where i left off, still has a long way to got. but of course i wont be putting up everything in here and spoil the beautiful storyÜ the movie simply depicted ones faith.  i am simply moved by this movie. it somehow strengthens the faith that i have. for whatever struggles that we are facing, we might not yet know the reason it happened but we are to do something for us to find out because God's gift works on mysterious ways. we shouldn't be blindsided by the negative things and yet lets open our hearts and minds and let Him get inside of Us for there is good in every bad. Bethany Hamilton is truly a face of courage, determination and faith. lets not put the blame to others, lets not pinpoint hence lets discover the things that are yet to be discovered to enjoy life. lets make this movie our instrument on redeeming ourselves on finding our purpose in this world of criticisms. because in this world of temptations we are close of committing it rather than analyzing it. lets stop judging our faith. lets stop questioning but rather find the answers because its there.. its there the whole time and we are just completely making different excuses of not looking at it. lets start to find God on our own ways. 

remember that everyone of us has its each Soul Surfer within...


“I could never have embraced this many people with two arms.” – Jeremiah 29:11" 

single is a gift.

i read a blog from someone i looked up to. and i got so inspired writing this post. she wrote something about being single. no, she is not single, she just got engaged, but she is freakingly got the right words to say to make me feel good about it and getting all these good vibes on writing this piece. been single for almost 2 years now. felt good about it at first but as you try to visualize yourself years from now that made me think that, 'hey i need one now!' and of course this shouldn't be rushed. its not something that you want it quickly done and its not something you ordered on a fast food chain and be in a speedy type of relationship. I'm not being cynical with all this brouhaha of getting committed or what not. all i know is that on HIS book, there's always that 'right' one for each and everyone of us. i maybe on a verge of getting panicky and all but here's the deal, being single is a self preservation thing.  i want to be worthy of a person i can be. if you don't feel right, why be such a kangaroo and jump unto the holes. i don't want to be rampant and make such lousy decisions because you think that time is no longer your on your side. you are not letting love get inside of you, rather you are getting into love 'just because' which doesn't makes it right and don't make sense at all.

yes i want the old fashioned kind of way. yes we live on a modern world, but hey i dreamt of this, being swept off and being swoon over. we are on a fast phased age now. it sucks on that part that everything is being shortcut. but on some it really works, those are the ones that are bound to happen no matter what and i get amazed by it. if there's such thing, then you deserve a tap at the back because you might have done something right in the past to be given such a great opportunity like that. but who would not want to get enthralled by the feeling of getting high with it. at the end of the day you still wished that a knight in shining armor will suddenly  comes into your life full of chaos and suddenly giving you such attention that would make you knees weak, tongue tied and mind blown. the guy that will complement my being. the guy who praise God words, the guy who doesn't boast whatever success  he has, and mostly the guy that will love the people behind me and wont take the world away from me thus make our each others world wrapped around us. its a kind of feeling that would make my life go circus but in a good way (ok im smiling right now dang!Ü ) and just by having that thought im getting giddy with the feeling. and so im not scared.. not anymore .. because i wanna be ready and be the kind of person that would be more than deserving for that. its my reward. so single ladies, dont frown. while you have the time of singlehood, enjoy it, make the most out of it and be someone worthy of the that wonderful feeling because the Man up there will provide Ü

indeed single is a gift. 

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails." 

                                                                      1 Corinthians 13:4–8

people of my year for 2011.

this blog im having right now is very personal, very close to my heart. these are the people that made some impact on my life last 2011. different strokes for different folks. these are some of the people that influenced me in a lot of ways. i was inspired to do this not just because to give credit to them but its also a reminder for myself that i wont be who i am right now without them Ü

ida and ara padiernos.

padiernos sisters. in life its not everyday that you meet people that you know that its for keeps. but with them, i can attest that its possible. we dont meet regularly but when we do, its a super blast and im looking forward on more years with them because its not everyday that you meet people who remain grounded and humble

omc/hp family.

my omc and hp family is such a great blessing for me. i have met different people in the past but these people has contributed a lot in my life in terms of dealing life. professionally i have learned a LOT because of the support system i have with them. i never thought that workplace can just be your playground when you are around with these folks.

rosely mendoza.

my future sister in law. i can never imagine my brother Patrick ending up with anyone but rosely. whats amazing is that we clicked because we have the same humor crack and for me thats more than enough to love her dearly. but sliding a bit, i am just amaze how she was brought up well by her parents, her family mirrors of what my family has and thats more than enough proof that she is the right one for my brother. looking forward for their wedding this year, Yay!

jagger family.

these people are my breather. after all the stressful world you have from the outside, they are the ones that makes me feel light after my long day. makes me feel good that they will save my ass whenever im on trouble. jagger has opened different perspective of what friendship really is and its not just that because its MORE than that...  

shiela pantino.

she definitely adds rhythm into me. if you are down, she is the right person to talk to because she has all the right words to say to make you feel better, truly an epitome of taking chances and believing. she is one person that i can turn into outside my real world but still manage to make me feel that im in no difference at all. she made a big impact on me for the last 4years. 

mina lopez.

faith is the reason why i look up to her. sis is the kind of person that in spite/despite of the struggles we go through you can still sense the strength of this person. i have learned that faith will always play a vital role in our lives and we just have to see through it. and mina is enough proof of it.    

pamela papilla.

my constant confidante whether sad or happy ones. no dull moments with my pampee. we can spend 24/7 talking without running out of things to say. and whats so good about it, we talk like we are on a stage cracking humor here and there but still there's a sense on what we are talking about and you will realize you've been laughing your hearts out! i cant remember how many times i cried and laughed with her. 

patricia ylagan.

my buddy for almost 20years. we even call each other "TOL" and by it you knew that  its more than just that. we may debate on some things because of our differences but those conflicts has been the steadfast of our friendship all these years. no questions asked she's been there for me for more than half of my life. :) 

 

maybelle untalan.

we fight and bicker with small issues, we argue a lot but still we end up chasing the same waves. we maybe like mutt and jeff or tom and jerry but still we managed to be each others comfort zone. she just knew everything about me that just by a wink of an eye she knows it already. maybs indeed is my true wingman. 

mama and papa.


having them on my list is a no brainer. for the simplest reason that they are the reason for of my existence. they celebrated their 30th wedding anniversary last year and God im so lucky that everyday i have seen the love they share for each other. and someday i also dream of having a partner that would last just like my ermats and erpats :)

bye 2011, hello 2012.

another year has passed. 2011 was somewhat rocky in terms of "friends". had a fall out with some one who is very dear to me but found way to at least make some amends early this year (which Iam very thankful!). with my last post from last year it only reflects how the deep the wound was. not the normal stuff you would fight about among your friends. its not something like you missed someone's birthday, its not like you get dead drunk and you happen to spill her most embarrassing moment, its not like you ditch out your barkada getaway just because you made some other plans with your partner. this one is BIG. did not see it coming. didn't thought that this one would break us apart. this involves RESPECT, something you cant buy. something that each and everyone deserves somehow. this people has been my steadfast all these years. what i am right now and whatever choices i made is because they had something to do with it. directly or indirectly, they have an impact on everything i do and say. it breaks me sometimes because at one point of my life, i fought for them. but now, its all up to Him, to make build the bridges again. if when? i don't know and am not sure anymore. 

my personal career, good and bad. i finally bid goodbye to a company that molded me in a hundred ways. has given the opportunity to showcase my capability on meeting up with my tasks. a chance for me to grow and go beyond of what i am used to do. i was exposed on a different world but was able to adjust and got fit with it. but in every growth you need to make a move out to explore new things, to share what you have learned and be thankful from the company that taught me those things. 

my family, its one part of me that i can always be PROUD OF. the comfort of having one is a complete proof of my faith with Man Up There. and if this is something i can have each and every year, i have no other complaints but Give Thanks to the Big Fella! i just wish nothing but good health among everyone of us. because at end of the day, they are the reason of my being and my existence in this world.

Hello 2012, this year will be my 30th of existence. like everyone else, i want to make a difference. i don't have to do something crazy this year, but i hope i can do something that make sense. and i am looking forward of making big choices, leap to greater heights, and one HEALTHY 2012 for me! CHEERS for the great year ahead! Ü